In our work and business arenas we expect our employer to tell us what they expect of us. Without super clear and consistent communication we wouldn’t know what to do or how to do it. For whatever reason we know and practice that expectation management at work but this is much less common at home.
It would be very difficult to be a good father or husband if you didn’t know what your kids or spouse expect of you. I mean honestly… have you ever asked the question?
INSERT SPOUSE NAME HERE, what do you expect from me as your husband?
I recently asked my wife this question and I learned some things that really helped me understand where we were butting heads recently. She had a specific expectation of me as her husband that I wasn’t meeting. If I hadn’t asked that question I might have gone a very long time without understanding where we were disconnected.
For my younger children they answer the question generally with their most immediate need like, “Dad, help me build this lego tower.” Older children are better and understanding and communicating their needs. Over time the things your children expect of you change and so it becomes important to ask them on a regular basis so you can be everything THEY expect you to be.